Well I have to apologize. I let a week go by without a single post. Something I had included in my New Years Goals. However, that is why it was a goal. Something to work towards, with the hope of achieving.That means I am not a failure for not doing it perfect the first time. I will pick myself back up and continue to strive towards that goal.
I think after this post you will see why I missed the last week.
Dan and I, for the most part, are fairly in shape people. We strive to maintain our weight, eat healthy and get plenty of exercise, we don’t smoke, drink or partake of any harmful substances. Our Doctors generally tend to be satisfied with what we do and believe us to be fairly close to the ideal patient. That being said, we still find ourselves slipping down the weight gain ladder. Especially as we keep doing that annoying thing called aging each year. Once again we found ourselves in that “time to clean up, shape up and get back on track” mode. We took a good look at where we are at, and where we are at is not satisfactory.
One of us was more unsatisfied than the other. One of us needed a little more “tuning up” than the other. One of us is named Dan.
Dan decided it was time to do something major. To really get a hold of himself and be who he wants to be Today. Not Tomorrow, not Next Year or Someday. But Now. So he asked if I would do P90X with him. Dan has supported me in a lot of my fitness goals, so it was time to give back. I agreed and we ordered the program. While we were waiting for it to arrive I started to think about how I was soon going to be back to eating clean. How it was time to clean out the fridge/pantry, say no to Ice Cream and yes to Carrots.
For the first time in a while, I didn’t want to say no to Ice Cream. I wanted to say YES! Chocolate and Cookies and Crackers, OH MY!
Oh Cookie Monster. You know how I feel.
It was no longer going to be time for cookie. :-(
I started to feel grumpy about it. Then a little resentful. Then A LOT of Grumpy and Resentful. I was Grumpsentful.
So I said to myself, “Self, you are backwards. Somewhere you got confused and want junk, not goodness and health. Time to take control.”
And that is when I had the Worst Best Idea Ever.
I recently saw this little pin on Pinterest. It links to What The Sparkle.
I like what she said about it, I thought to myself, “people like Dr. Oz, I like people, so this must be good.” I floated over to the Dr. Oz site to find out more. This is where I read things like, “This was great!” “Worked for me!” “I was never hungry” “I lost 500 pounds in three days!” Ok, I exaggerate, but you get my point. I thought, “this is what I need to get back on track.” So I emailed the link to Dan and he said he was in.
So first day of P90X was also the first day of the Dr. Oz Three Day Cleanse. Here is the rundown for the cleanse.
1st day – This is not so bad. People are wimps if they call this hard. What are they complaining about. I Feel great. Lunch and dinner are not that good, but you can power through it, no prob.
First Half of 2nd Day – Wow, everyone is super annoying. I have a headache, I miss food. This is hard, but manageable. I can do this. Remember chewing? That was nice.
Second Half of 2nd Day – Can Everyone Please Stop Making That Annoying Sound Called Talking! This Smoothie Is Disgusting But I Can Power Through. Where Is Food!!!! I Want Pizza!!! Who’s Stupid Idea Was This!
3rd Day – ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME!!!!! PEOPLE ARE SO ANNOYING!!!! I WILL LITERALLY START EATING MY ARM IF I DON’T CHEW SOMETHING SOON!!! MY HEAD HURTS SO BAD!!! IF I HAVE TO DRINK OR LOOK AT ONE MORE LIQUID I AM GOING TO TAKE A HAMMER TO EVERY BLENDER, FRUIT AND VEGETABLE IN THIS HOUSE. I AM GOING TO BED AT A RIDICULOUSLY EARLY TIME TO END THIS MISERY!
Do you see why I was NOT in the mood to write anything last week?
So yeah, not so easy. Dan and I did it, but have since made a Pinky Swear to NEVER do it again. We did lose weight, (Dan 4, me 7) but it was only water weight. It came right back on in two days. One positive thing did come from it though. This is the part that makes it the Best Idea. I was so happy to start eating food again, that I didn’t care that it was such a clean diet. Bring it on carrots! Say yes to celery! Apple, you are the best. As long as I can crunch you, I love you! I no longer hunt for any chocolate crumbs in the house. I don’t need it. I am just so happy to eat any food that I don’t even want the junk.
So do I recommend this?
NO WAY! It was awful and horrible and the worst and longest three days of my life. However if you really want to kick your Naughty Cravings to the curb. This WILL do it. It really did get me back on track to eating healthy again and I am not Grumpsentful anymore. So The Smithocracy stance, Do It At Your Own Risk. Also hide all weaponry first.
How is P90X you ask?
I really like it! Great workouts so far and we feel good doing them. 100% Smithocracy approval. Although I did receive this text from Dan while I was typing this.
Ouch. I feel like somebody is pogo sticking my body, but the pogo stick is made of knives with acid on the blades. Feel the Burn. Luv the Burn. Be the Burn.
So yeah. It hurts. But it is a good hurt that puts everything back where it goes.
Have you done any crazy things in the name of fitness and health? Please share so we know we are not the only crazy’s in crazy town!